So this is me. My name is Amanda Marie. No I do not and will not share my last name. Not necessary for all the fame and fortune that this little blog probably won’t get. I have Borderline Personality Disorder, a hard case of resting bitch face, anxiety, Bipolar disorder. I listen to hard rock and alternative and sometimes a lot of stuff from the good ol’ 90’s. I mean can you really go wrong with some Blues Traveler and then maybe The Pretty Reckless or Halestorm, maybe Blink 182, sum 41.. I don’t know, I listen to weird shit. I’m 23, I work nights at my dad’s towing company as a dispatcher (I’d say I’m pretty damn good at my job and making money, most of the guys like me, the other ones just think I’m a bitch and I’m okay with that lol) I like to draw, paint, write, sing, attempting to learn piano, violin, and guitar (doing things and constantly keeping myself busy helps me keep my anxiety under control, if I cant think about anything but what i’m doing, I cant let my thoughts get to me. It also helps me manage my emotions because when I’m not over thinking, I’m not going cray cray) I am dyslexic, I like art museums, I love the planetarium, I adore going to the zoo even though they treat their animals like shit out here, I like the aquarium and this really big garden place they have out here. I like outdoorsy stuff. I love working out and lifting weights even though i’m a fatty. I enjoy boxing and soon hope to get into roller derby. Now here is my dilemma. These things I love, enjoy, some I couldn’t even live without doing. But then my disease kicks in and I’m wiped out. No energy, no appetite, no want to do anything but lay in bed and hide from the world. It literally pains me to drag my sorry ass out of bed. Somehow this thing in my brain that’s taken over my life makes my whole body feel like I was hit by a Mac truck. It’s like all the energy is drained out of my body, like waking up from a drug induced coma.
And that’s just the start my dear readers.